i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
