Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
