I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
