So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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