Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
