No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
