that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
