The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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