dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
