Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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