I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
