the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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