Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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