Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
