you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
time to smoke my breakfast
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
