Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
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