ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm passing your future prison.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
