We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
