He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Randomize
