he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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