I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
