Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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