That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
