just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
