I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
My sheets look like a crime scene.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
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In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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