He asked to "fluff my boner.."
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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