We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
