the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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