I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize