Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
