I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
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