What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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