Me. At least after what I've been through.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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