508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Randomize