ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
