We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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