i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
