fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
