I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
