well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize