May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize