he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
