Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
