Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
