We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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