I want you more than these girls want KFC
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
