And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
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