Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry http://tfl.nu/sko0
  Replies (41) Good night (3970) Bad night (1566)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant??? http://tfl.nu/mp1l
  Replies (53) Good night (8232) Bad night (2414)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties. http://tfl.nu/ddyo
  Replies (22) Good night (6283) Bad night (2047)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok http://tfl.nu/hllh
  Replies (7) Good night (3317) Bad night (991)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar http://tfl.nu/34wt
  Replies (6) Good night (4617) Bad night (1439)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house http://tfl.nu/x9ej
  Replies (11) Good night (3507) Bad night (1153)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant. http://tfl.nu/xyax
  Replies (8) Good night (2731) Bad night (871)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other http://tfl.nu/z80n
  Replies (14) Good night (1763) Bad night (4300)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her http://tfl.nu/006u
  Replies (5) Good night (1299) Bad night (676)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to? http://tfl.nu/dwjv
  Replies (3) Good night (1112) Bad night (884)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever http://tfl.nu/rkkg
  Replies (3) Good night (1518) Bad night (502)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras

  (1-805): View more from California

  hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras (1-805): hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five. http://tfl.nu/dvx9
  Replies (0) Good night (636) Bad night (365)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold. http://tfl.nu/ite7
  Replies (3) Good night (709) Bad night (324)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL. http://tfl.nu/2qpw
  Replies (2) Good night (1205) Bad night (292)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  Why is your solution always to masturbate

  (1-801): View more from Utah

  Because it usually works

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): Why is your solution always to masturbate (1-801): Because it usually works http://tfl.nu/41jb
  Replies (4) Good night (896) Bad night (289)

Randomize