why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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