My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
