Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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